Premature ejaculation (PE) is a problem that many are faced with, but few are willing to confront. A recent study showed that 29% of Malaysian men could be suffering from PE but are reluctant to talk about it or see a doctor for treatment. Why? Well, because it’s embarrassing, and also because they think the problem’s purely due to psychological reasons.
However embarrassing it may be, you don’t have to let PE ruin your sex life. There are a range of treatment options available as long as you are willing to talk about it with your doctor. Overcome that embarrassment and you could overcome the problem.
What is Premature Ejaculation?
Premature ejaculation happens when a man reaches orgasm too quickly and he’s unable to control it. PE is a common sexual dysfunction that can happen the first time you had sex, or develop later in life. The International Society of Sexual Medicine defines it as a male sexual dysfunction with the following characteristics:
- You ejaculate before or within one minute of vaginal penetration
- You can’t delay (or control) ejaculation on all or nearly all vaginal penetrations
- You are distressed, bothered, frustrated when it comes to sexual intimacy (decreased sexual pleasure)
- You avoid sexual intimacy
It’s important to know that PE is different from Erectile Dysfunction, and cannot be treated with the same medication (like Viagra etc, which is meant for ED, and not PE).
What Causes PE?
Ejaculation is influenced by a combination of physiological and psychological factors. In some cases, it could be psychological factors like anxiety, guilt, or depression that’s causing PE. In others, it could also be due to biological reasons such as hormonal problems, injury, or a side effect of some medicines. You should always get a proper diagnosis from the doctor before acting on the reasons behind your PE.
How do I know if I have PE?
Answer this Premature Ejaculation Diagnostic Tool questionnaire objectively:
Give youself a score from 0 – 4 for each of the questions below.
‘0’ – not difficult at all
‘1’ – somewhat difficult
‘2’ – moderately difficult
‘3’ – very difficult
‘4’ – extremely difficult.
1. How difficult is it for you to delay ejaculation?
2. Do you ejaculate before you want?
3. Do you ejaculate with very little stimulation?
4. Do you feel frustrated because of ejaculating before you want to?
5. How concerned are you that your time to ejaculation leaves your partner sexually unfulfilled?
Add up the total of your score, and see your results below:
- 8 or below: you have no PE
- 9 and 10: you probably have PE
- 11 or above: you have PE
Looks like I may have PE, what do I do now?
Many guys tend to ignore the problem, hoping it’ll go away on its own. Some fear that coming forward to seek help will lead them to be stigmatised or humiliated.
However, letting it fester on is not a great thing for relationships, said Dr George Lee, a consultant urologist at the Universiti Malaya.
“The impact PE has on men and their partners can be devastating for a relationship. This is not simply a problem about a man’s self-esteem or prowess, but it also has great impact on a woman’s fulfilment and, ultimately, the entire relationship.” he said.
“Men need to recognise that in order to protect their relationships, it is important not to let a treatable condition continue to hamper their ability to have a fulfilling sexual experience with their partner,” Dr Lee advised.
The good news is that PE can be treated
Treatment options include:
- Behavioural techniques
- Psychological counselling
- Reducing penile sensation
- Drug treatment
The treatment options may vary depending on your personal needs, so it’s best to consult your doctor before DIY-ing something as important as this. You may have also come across ads online touting miracle pills that’ll solve your problem once and for all, but we advise you to speak to a medical professional before taking something that may be bad for your body.
Don’t suffer in silence. Seek help. Learn more about PE at Controlpe.com.my.
Do you or your partner suffer from premature ejaculation? Have you tried talking about it? Share your thoughts in the comments below.